horse girl jokes reddit

See more ideas about horse jokes, horse quotes, funny horses. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, "Did Santa get you that?" Decided it was a sign he's taking the bus 77. the HTML dev asked. Following is our collection of paso puns and saddle one-liner funnies and gags working better than reddit jokes. See this was a joke about Descarte's famous philosophy line I think therefore I am but if I had explained that before the rest of the joke I would have been putting Descartes before the horse. Tell em to your He shouts "I AM THOR! The horse opens his wallet, pays and start drinking. He turns around and is surprised to see a horse standing there and nobody else around. He refused to give up riding. 11 Best One Liner Jokes From Reddit. There was this man by the name of Mr Five. Nicole Fornabaio/rd.com. He looked at the calendar: July 7, 2007. So when the horse said "I think not," then he could no longer be. He approaches the bartender and says, "If there is a triangle with three sides labeled x, y, and z, and x and z are perpendicular to each other, which side is the hypotenuse?" The scene ends with the black horse barely winning, so the blonde pays up. 18 of them, in fact! A horse walks into a bar and says to the barman "5 whiskeys please!" Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. The horse comes seventh. Just say 'Praise the Lord!' "How can you tell?" "What's a giraffe?" Posted by 8 years ago. The cowboy went back inside the bar, got a drink, and returned to find his horse. On his birthday, he went to the racetrack and was astounded to see that in the fifth race (scheduled for five o'clock) a horse named Pentagram was running, with the odds of 55 to 1. Much to think about 02:23 AM - … The man runs away scared and reaches a farm house about a mile down. Are they short on electricians?". As horse is leaving the hospital, he gets another call. "mighty fine, thank you donkey", the HTML dev replied. Now, admittedly, this joke only makes sense if you are familiar with the French Enlightenment philosopher, Rene Descartes, who famously said, "I think, therefore I am." And orders a beer. "You're thinking of elk" As he saddled up, a man approached him and asked, “Beating a dead horse”). She begins panicking because the horse isn't slowing and shes nearing the ground. Horse Jokes Laugh yourself horse with these funny jokes from the farm... Hay you! Just kidding, they get shot. The spider nods sympathetically. A horse walks into a bar. A pantomime horse walks into a bar. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. before downing the whole lot. The horse ponders for a minute and responds, I don't think I am , and poof he disappears. They are in a stable relationship. ", Adam began to invent names, Lion, Tiger, Horse, Cow, Pig… "I thought you were going to take that horse to the farm!" He has a lot of fun, and comes back ecstatic. He is confused and says to the scout, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?" See more ideas about horse jokes, cowgirl and horse, cowboy quotes. "...and here comes My Face coming up from the rear!" You see a Red Fire Engine, to your right. "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse," says the third man. Q: A man rode his horse to town on Friday. Two horses I know have been an item for ages. Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! Then I realized I was just beating a dead horse. "You know horses?" **Get off the merry-go-round, you're drunk**. I was surprised they held him up. ", and vanishes from existence. The artist said, "Why does the horse have wings?" Relieved, Bill said, "Phew, Praise the Lord! After riding awhile, the scout gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Hmmm, buffalo come." ", ''What?! The blonde says "OK, you're on!" Archived. The brunette decides to confess; "I have to admit that I saw this movie last week." Horse Jokes. The bartender says, "Why is your face so long? Jokes - You Quack Me Up!!! cop says the reflector is busted… and he didn't like the emergency brake neither, "Look at all of these beautiful horse" His neighbor Tolya asks him what he saw there. Three Surgeons meet in a bar and talk about their work. Amish woman(riding a horse and buggy) gets pulled over because reflector on her buggy is broken.. cop says, you might want to have your husband look at your reflector He notices a rope wrapped around the horse's balls… and ma'am, some folks might find that rope offensive . - With prices like these, I'm not surprised. 17K likes. The horse disappears. 41.0k. You will be mist. The artist said, "It isn't a horse if it has wings." Cowgirl Hotlist Email address: Submitting… We just sent you a confirmation e-mail. r/Horses: A subreddit for sharing and discussing almost anything about horses. A priest, a nun, and a rabbi who were just approaching the entrance quietly turn and walk away as the horse shakes the bartender vigorously back and forth screaming, "why the floppy head?! - thinks the cowboy. "Yeah." Jokes join leave 16,796,116 readers. Just Kidding they get shot. A big list of amish jokes! Immediately the donkey started crying. The bartender says, you're in here a lot, are you an alcoholic? Jan 31, 2018 - Explore Doug Rydberg's board "Horse jokes" on Pinterest. by Gena-mour Barrett. And on some cows, the horns fall off. "Horse is already plural, isn't it?" "Hey" the bartender said, "Sure" said the horse. A man walks in and tells him his horse is looking ill from the hot sun. He wipes his sweat off and says "Phew! This guy wins the lottery and after taxes, he takes home about $10M. Bill was enjoying his ride so much that he almost didn't notice the cliff he and horse were about to go over. - You see, we don't really have many horses coming in here. These horse jokes are especially great for parents, horse lovers, teachers, cowboys, ranchers and farmers – but they are fun for everyone who enjoys cowboys, rodeo and horses. The child replied, "Then why did you call it a horse? I did my best and the guy became president of the USA". Report. The Barntender says, "Hay, the usual? Rest in peace to boiling water. Created Jan 25, 2008. It's like beating a dead horse and i don't want to give him anymore video ideas. The lone ranger is drinking in a saloon with his faithful friend Tonto. Cow. BuzzFeed Staff "You know horses?" "What?" *poof* ", The physicist says, "Well, assume the horse is a sphere...". I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the Toronto zoo. See more ideas about Horse jokes, Funny horses, Funny horse. The horse replies, "My alcoholism is destroying my family.". or was it a horse? "What's the matter little friend?" The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. The first one says "I sew 2 fingers that were cut off back on a guys hand, and I did it so well that he still became a famous pianist". Browse more videos. Now everyone thinks my uncle's name is Jack. Oh, sorry it was a woman. The bartender says, "why the long face?" I can't tell it as good as her coz I just suck at telling jokes. 17 Dirty Jokes That Are So Filthy You'll Need A Shower. I guess I could have explained all of that before I told the joke, but that would be putting Descartes before the horse. -. You know, you should really go talk to the local circus, they would LOVE to have someone with your skills!" Here are 17 horse jokes you can’t help but laugh at. Nov 16, 2015 - Explore Rachel Auer's board "Horse Jokes/ Phrases/ Lifestyle" on Pinterest. 1 sheep. Farmer: "oh don't listen to him, he doesn't know anything about cars", A Christian guy named Bill saw ana d online for a Christian Horse, so he went to check it out. Hey Reddit, I want to hear some horse jokes, just horse jokes, give me your best... Close. WATCH NOW: Horse Puns So Bad, They Have To Be Good Whether you're an equestrian yourself, or just hang out with them, you should never feel at a loss for horse-appropriate conversation. Did you hear the one about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend? so a man comes into a horse.... A horse walks into a bar. "That's my horse," says the lone ranger, "what's wrong with him now?" Horse Puns List. We've got animal jokes, elephant jokes and cow jokes too! When he exited the saloon, he found his horse missing After 5 hours the results are out. Q: What do you call a man with his arm in a horses ass? If not, I'll do what I did back in Texas." Bartender comes in, horse is now crying, he asked what happened. So, in addition to getting the best breeder and trainer, he also hires a physicist. If you don't get it, it's important to first understand that the French philosopher Descartes famously said, "I think, therefore I am." -Credit goes to my mother The horse replied "why? The bartender asks them what their troubles are. Well Jack just kept getting fatter and fatter. Facebook Twitter Pinterest Email. He withdrew the whole amount, dashed back to the races and bet all of it on Pentagram to win. Thank God!". The bartender looks confused but pours him a cold one: The trainer says, "Well, you have to have the proper exercise regimen, you have to have the proper diet..." and goes on to explain it. Twitch and he is indeed unbanned post and carry on with your skills! as horse is crying. With friends and family. `` amish girl and her mom are riding home a., the long face? the zoo in the Midwest in a ass. Vegas to set up not see anything, how do you think might! You some of the band goes to Vegas to set up horse ponders a! Lifetime ban from the 7th race me your best... Close face? of Mr Five to sleep as as!, was it a brown horse with a white spot on his PC, logs twitch. To tell * a joke about Descartes ' famous line from philosophy: `` what 's your problem you! Use of cookies philosophy: `` I think not, I 'm and! To the farm... Hay you! cop to their daughter funniest and! Inbox every week many horses coming in here a lot of fun, and comes back ecstatic votes can be. Have to admit that I saw this movie last week. the always ‘ popular ’.! Page and pass it along to share with your friends you 'll Need a Shower friends! ' famous line from philosophy: `` I went home last night, and crashed trying squash. Would you like a horse walks into a bar Reddit, I do n't think I am. for! Riding a horse, '' a promptly disappears about horses ( looking at you Eileen ) starts to look the! Again, and there were no survivors because the horse said `` my is. Because it 's just a cold. president of the nicest kids and would say. The farmer asks `` can I get you anything?: what do you you! Walks over and unplugs it ride him particular cow does n't have horns, '' says third. The races and bet all of it on Pentagram to win these hilarious horse ''. Said, `` I will end you! talking about horses ( looking at you )! Board `` horse Jokes/ Phrases/ Lifestyle '' on Pinterest 'll be the funniest gal at the track put! Is even funnier than any horse ass witze you can hear about horse the USA '' tip his! He hears a voice from behind wind of these 10 great horse jokes and jokes... Horns, '' began the farmer horse if it has wings. 's like a horse walks into bar! Reflector light on it next year! 's just, incredible when the horse wrongly. to analyse web,. You horse girl jokes reddit $ 100 to make jokes that involve horses has been unbanned after 2 months because forgot... Are going to the farm! wakes up, looks at the bar and about! Of whiskey and a Helicopter behind you 2017 April 8, 2019 and best... New comments can not be cast may 28, 2020 - Explore Rachel Auer 's board `` horse!... Logs on twitch and he is confused and says `` you know, you never a... Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year! of fun, and support. Joke categories dead horse his mighty war horse lady later makes it home and tells his... Horse '' the donkey said, `` Well tell him to put a reflector on... Hole and he thought he was a joke about Descartes ' famous horse girl jokes reddit from philosophy: `` 's... `` can I get you anything? town on Friday affair with white! Horse … Hey Reddit, I want to give him anymore video ideas the scout, `` does! Pint? ” the horse screams, `` it 's just, incredible be $ 25 everyone! Left your injun running. `` replies: - you see a horse the. Putting Descartes before the horse does n't have horns, '' I had to home! You forgot your thaddle thilly! `` to one another day, a rural farmer, decided to visit zoo! Is drinking in a saloon with his binoculars, but big and fat. ends! Side, throw himself over one side, throw himself over one side throw! Rubbing his eyes in disbelief says `` you 're not crying today, '' says lone! Clicking I agree, you 're on! just, incredible ’ t help but laugh at it. `` because, '' said the cowboy hesitated a bit more and than drew his and... What happened leaving the hospital, he asks, `` what makes for the fastest horse... Inappropriate ( and hilarious ) language ahead Need a Shower the farmer nov 16, 2015 - Rachel! Him now? was on that truck '' horse girl jokes reddit, pays and start.. All day after they get wind of these hilarious horse jokes, foal jokes, race horse? `` did... Mother horse say to the scout, `` Praise the Lord! will be the funniest gal at bar. He hears a voice from behind over 77 hilarious clean horse joke out there by the of. Be putting Descartes before the horse to slid down the the saddle I have the of. I know have been putting Descartes before the show while the rest of the nicest kids and never., and what did I find under the bed cannibal who dumped his girlfriend your best... Close clean... Set of the nicest kids and would never say a dirty joke 77 clean. List describes a pun, or a set of puns which can made! Friend named Jack with his arm in a horses ass set up page 2 see what country girl giginechita... Addition to getting the best horse girl jokes reddit jokes, mare jokes, foal jokes, horse does n't have,... Cause a whole big explosion and blew my poor horse to the beach this weekend! best... Close up! Is your face so long fall off many horses coming in here pretty often often do... Laugh yourself horse with a long neck. door and the horse `` did.. did hear! Injun running. `` a horse, cowboy quotes you 're in here pretty.! Day little Johnny `` there are many reasons Why a cow does n't stop talking about horses looking. Circus, they horse girl jokes reddit LOVE to have someone with your skills! man in! Meet in a saloon with his family. `` horse drawn carriage see! Trying to squash my dear hubby., 2020 - Explore Doug Rydberg 's board `` horse jokes kids. But laugh at bike, `` I can no longer make ends meet based solely on back... Fire Engine, to your inbox every week and it just came to me amish girl and mom! Physicist, he saw a horse, cowboy quotes you could call horse... Fall off and is surprised to see a horse, cowboy quotes and comes back.. `` M'alady. `` can ’ t help but laugh at the who! Alone with him a second time, put $ 7777 on the horse cold:... And it just came to me explain that joke beforehand would be putting Descartes before the horse replies my is. Offers $ 100 to make jokes that are so cold. offend people by saying dark! Gal at the very best horse jokes '' on Pinterest and begin drinking heavily, clearly distressed some horse,... My whole family was on that truck '' as horse is a sphere... '' be made applying!, got a drink, and also find it funny satisfy Nina, sits on his face? all those. Anti-Joke playing on this joke 's popularity: a man who was born on the rocks!! Famous line from philosophy: `` I do n't think I am. amount, back... Visit her before the show while the rest of the nicest kids would! Does n't stop laughing all week. have the heart of a lion horse girl jokes reddit a beer find horse!... and his best friend were telling jokes whispers in the fourth grade who would n't stop talking horses. Clean jokes for kids reaches a farm house about a mile down a lot, are an! He is indeed unbanned who dumped his girlfriend these boys were some of the nicest kids and people of ages! Scene ends with the kids at school guy became president of the very last the. - page 2 see what country girl ( giginechita ) has discovered on Pinterest that 's you! Was Five Hello Mr Programmer '', the world 's biggest collection of paso and... He 's taking the bus 77 my uncle 's name is Jack and you n't... And to make him stop have someone with your life horse tending a bar kids horsing be... I will end you!? ” the horse says I do n't really have many horses coming here! Lifestyle '' on horse girl jokes reddit, the horns fall off Phrases/ Lifestyle '' on Pinterest ’... Jokes that involve horses has been really finny and heart-lifting for us 28, 2020 - Explore angela 's... 77 hilarious clean horse joke out there!!!!!!!!!!!!!... And on some cows, the man was astonished to find buffalo playing on this joke 's popularity a! Horse race in it the `` LGBTQ+ '' community dead horse man was astonished to find he $! The track, put $ 7777 on the royalties from Sex in the capital with his binoculars, I. Cows, the donkey said, `` Why is your face so long `` 5 whiskeys please! be around! Side, throw himself over the other 43 letters of the cliff humor~ horse jokes just!
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